Volunteer
Zookeeper, ballerina, amateur herpetologist, beekeeper, costume maker, and orphaned
squirrel rehabilitator. These are all titles I have held at some point in my
grade school career. Titles that would not have been possible if my parents had
not made the decision to homeschool me and my sisters.
Although I knew it
existed, until I got to college, I had never personally encountered the
argument that homeschoolers do not achieve proper social skills because of
their style of education. For the majority of my life I had only come across
those who had recognized the vast benefits of homeschooling. It was intriguing
to me to see that the pervasive myth of homeschoolers receiving improper
socialization was present even among my peers.
After examining this issue from various
viewpoints, I have come to the following conclusions; when used properly,
homeschooling provides proper social skills, diverse relationships, and extensive
social interactions. Today, I hope to persuade you likewise.
When
used properly, homeschooling provides proper social skills because the
definition of social skills is misunderstood by mainstream society and because
when used properly, homeschooling teaches all necessary social skills.
Instead
of immediately questioning if homeschoolers have necessary social skills,
question if you understand what necessary social skills are. According to
dictionary.com, the definition of social skills is; “The personal skills needed for successful social communication and interaction.”
In a study conducted by Vanderbilt University, “[Stephen]
Elliott [and] Frank Gresham
identified the top 10 skills that students need to succeed based on surveys of over
8,000 teachers and over 20 years of research in classrooms across the country”.
The skills are:
1. Listen to others
2. Follow the steps
3. Follow the rules
4. Ignore distractions
5. Ask for help
6. Take turns when you talk
7. Get along with others
8. Stay calm with others
9. Be responsible for your behavior
10. Do nice things for others
1. Listen to others
2. Follow the steps
3. Follow the rules
4. Ignore distractions
5. Ask for help
6. Take turns when you talk
7. Get along with others
8. Stay calm with others
9. Be responsible for your behavior
10. Do nice things for others
Parents
are indeed concerned with socialization. In a survey of 31 homeschooling
parents and students roughly half said that socialization was of either high or
very high importance to them. The results did not vary much when student and
parent results were separated.
Students
have the opportunity to work directly with their parent who can more easily
monitor their behavior and help shape it in their early formative years. As the
students grow older, these skills are broadened by their interactions with
other people. Because students have the ability to work one-on-one with
parents, skills can be sharpened and weaknesses are able to be strengthened.
Now
that we have a clear understanding of what proper social skills are, we can
take a look at the social relationships homeschooling can offer students.
When
used properly, homeschooling provides diverse social relationships because
homeschoolers grow up in diverse families and because homeschoolers are exposed
to a variety of demographics
I
have met homeschooled students from different religions, ethnicities, and socio-economic
backgrounds. Families with members who have different gender identifications,
different races within the family, and families with members who had various
learning challenges or health issues. In the same way that public or privately
schooled students come from unique backgrounds, homeschoolers are not all cut from
the same cloth.
According
to the National Center for Education Statistics’ 2011-2012 report on education
in the United States, 32% of home-educated students were in a minority group
and 20% of all home-educating families were considered poor.
93%
of my in-class survey participants said that they were friends with students
from different schooling backgrounds than theirs. Interestingly enough, 94% of
the homeschoolers who responded said that they are friends with public or
private schooled students as well.
In
a survey, one homeschooling parent listed questions they kept in mind when
thinking of necessary social skills,
“Can my child converse with those he or she
comes in contact with in a clear and understandable way? Are they able to speak
with the appropriate vocabulary depending on the age of the person they are
speaking with? Are they able to make and maintain eye contact with those they
are speaking? Are they able to engage in meaningful conversation with all ages
and demographics they come in contact with?”
This
parent is not only concerned with making sure their student is exposed to a
variety of demographics, they have considered the skills their student will
need to master such interactions.
Another
parent’s response was, “My children participate in swimming for 3 hours a day
with other children their own age who are homeschooled and public school
children. They also participate in Band and Choir with same age children. When
in high school they take dual enrollment college courses. They also volunteer
in church with people of all ages. So they socialize with people of different ages
in a variety of activities.”
Social
skills are seldom selected as a point of strife for students in public school
systems. Yet while a public or privately schooled students spends approximately
6 hours a day inside of a school, homeschoolers are able to participate in
activities outside of their home at any time they choose.
Personally,
I have done my schoolwork everywhere from doctors’ offices to car inspection
lines. Because I could take my schoolwork with me, I was able to meet more
people and see more situations than I might have elsewise. Homeschool support
groups I have participated in would go to nursing homes or assisted living
homes to sing Christmas carols or hand out Valentine’s Day cards. Because of my
involvement with 4H, I was selected as a teen leader for a day camp where I
helped master gardeners teach urban children all about where their food comes
from.
We
have discovered the diverse social relationships a homeschooler may encounter,
it is now time to examine their social interactions.
When
used properly, homeschooling provides extensive social interactions because homeschoolers
have regular scholastic social interactions and because homeschoolers
participate in extra-curricular activities.
In his article “Revisiting Common Myths about Homeschoolers”,
Michael Romanowski stated that “On the average, homeschooled students are
involved in 5.2 activities outside the home, with 98 percent engaged in two or
more.”
Out
of the 8 homeschoolers whose classwork was confined to their home only, 7 of
them still participated in activities outside the home on a weekly basis. These
included Civil Air Patrol, band, sports teams, and classes with other students.
As
you can see from the photos, homeschoolers are able to participate in
a multitude of extracurricular activities. Everything from working with animals
to being in a circus, running a 5K to being a beekeeper, and even going to prom
or senior banquets.
According
to my survey of homeschoolers, extracurricular activities they participate in
include: 4H, dance, volunteer work, field trips, parties, scouts, Taekwondo,
gymnastics, music lessons, and hanging out with friends.
In review, I have shown you why, when used properly,
homeschooling provides proper social skills, diverse relationships, and extensive
social interactions. Now, this is not to say that every single homeschooled
student will display all ten skills at all times, and this is not to say that
every homeschooled student will receive enough diverse socialization for them
to not be individually labeled as socially awkward or unsure. However, as I
hope I have shown you, these students are rare and should be considered
outliers. The majority of homeschooling students are active members of their
community.
As one mother told me just recently, “Socialization? I am too busy
driving my children from ballet to archery to 4-H to be able to focus on
socialization.”
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